Aidan, our baby boy.
I cannot believe my last post was written in August. Wow, how time goes so quickly and how quickly time changes many things.
Today, I don't want to talk about how to save money (although a post on vacationing in NYC, taking a cruise and visiting Disney World on a budget is coming in the near future) or which exercise routine/meals (again, you will be reading about PiYo and my smoothie obsession in the coming weeks) I'm currently enjoying. Instead, I want to talk about family...MY family!
Since my last post I have; lost my Grandpa Russell to cancer, said a heart wrenching "good bye" to our foster lovie Little Man A, and (just yesterday) buried my Grandpa Howell, who at the age of 91, died of complications from Influenza A and Pneumonia.
However, we also gained Eve and Vera, my healthy and beautiful twin nieces who bring joy to everyone around. And, as of today, we welcomed 12 day old foster baby Aidan (while his birth name is something different, this is the nickname we've chosen to give him for the sake of protecting his identity) into our precious family!
Many of you know that our desire to adopt has been something we've been working towards since Dave was diagnosed with testicular cancer over 3 years ago. We were told at the time of his surgery that our likelihood of ever having more biological children was slim. 1.5 years ago, after a whole lot of prayer, we decided it was time to pursue our adoption dreams through the means of foster care.
Now, just to make things perfectly clear, foster care is NOT an adoption agency, and the process of getting certified is long and time consuming. You can have a child in your home for; hours, days, weeks, months or even years knowing that, eventually, they will be reunited with their birth family and hoping that their time with you will help give them a strong foundation to stand on. As we began our foster care journey in September 2013 it was with the hope of, in time, finding a baby boy who would be released for adoption while helping to provide a home for other children along the way.
We have been officially foster care certified since September 2014, and in that time we've been praying specifically for any and all children that may enter our home and be under our care. We've asked God to give us discretion to know when to say "yes" and "no" to a matcher's (the people on staff who call to see if you are able or willing to take a child needing a home) phone calls. It surprises me how many calls we've had for children in need of a home, and how many times we had to say "no".
In October we said "yes" to a respite, which could have potentially become a permanent, placement. It was for a 3 year old boy, our Little Man A. We loved him, he was part of our family. Unfortunately, because Abigail is also 3, it changed our family dynamic so drastically that we were not able to offer the permanent home he ended up in need of, and he was moved to a different foster family. I struggled so significantly with that decision that I began to question if foster care, or even adoption, was what I really wanted anymore. To make life changing decisions for a child, decisions that would effect their entire future, was so difficult and heartbreaking. But, we knew it was the right step for our family and for Little Man A as well. So, after praying over him and for him, we saw him moved into another home. A home with parents who are teaching him about Jesus, taking him to church, and allowing us to still have contact. He will forever be in our hearts, and thankfully we still have him in our lives as well.
Once Little Man A left us, I was convinced that we needed to close our home. I couldn't handle the emotional stress. I am thankful for the many family and friends who encouraged me during those sad weeks. During that time, when I truly wasn't sure what to do, Dave said something that's stuck with me each day since then. He reminded me that when it's time, God will reveal His will to us. That we've done our part in getting certified and being ready to provide a home for a little boy, now we needed to wait on Him to send us that little boy. I've never been much good at waiting...
In the meantime we began to really make decisions regarding our family, and what age might best fit in our make-up. We decided that a little boy 1 years old or under would be a natural addition, and would make for an easy transition with Bella and Abbi. And so, we've been waiting for him. In the meantime, many other calls have come for both boys and girls in need of a loving home, all of which we have had to say "no" to.
When Grandpa Howell was in the hospital, and we knew he would not be with us for more than a few days, I got a call about a one and a half year old boy. Since I was in Pennsylvania at the time and knew we would be facing funeral arrangements in the next few weeks, I had to say "no" to the placement and asked for our name to be taken off the call list until February. That would give our family time to get through the next few weeks and help heal some hurts. So, you can imagine our surprise when on Friday, January 23rd, as we were preparing to head to Syracuse for grandpa's calling hours, we got a call from a foster care matcher.
A 10 day old baby boy had just entered the foster care system and needed a home, they called us first (despite our request to not be called with placements until February) to see if we were interested. We knew, we simply knew, he was the one we've been waiting for. As we began to get more information about him, the more we could clearly see the Lord's hand in it. This perfectly formed in God's image, beautiful, precious child took his very first breath the same day my grandfather took his very last.
We do not know how long Aidan will be with our family. We would like to think he could be here forever, but it may only be a few days/weeks/months/etc. Either way, while he's in our home, we promise to take care of him. We promise to meet his needs. We promise to show him he's important and cherished.
We promise to pray for him. We promise to pray over him. We promise to let him know each day that he's a gift to our family. We promise to love him and, most importantly, we promise to let him know that God loves him even more.
You knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.."
Psalm 139:13-14a
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