In Christ Alone - This Wife's Perspective on Cancer

The song "In Christ Alone" has been a favorite of mine since I was young, and as an adult it has held me up through some of the most challenging moments!

In Christ alone my hope is found

He is my light, my strength, my song

this cornerstone, this solid ground

firm through the fiercest drought and storm

This morning Dave left the house and headed to get his annual CT scan and blood work done.  On Tuesday, March 10, 2015, we will find out from the oncologist if he is still cancer free.  I would be lying if I said I'm not anxious, because the truth is...the "what ifs" always make me nervous.

What heights of love, what depths of peace

when fears are stilled, when strivings cease

my Comforter, my All in All

here in the love of Christ I stand 

I will never forget the morning of Saturday, December 17, 2011 when Dave said "Cassie, we might have a problem."  Early that next Monday, Dave called his doctor and was immediately seen.  They wanted to send him for further testing that would either confirm or rule out testicular cancer.  An appointment was made for an ultrasound at Highland the very next day and the results, which indeed confirmed cancer, where given to Dave on Thursday, December 22... just 3 days before Christmas. 

There in the ground His body lay

Light of the world by darkness slain

then, bursting forth in glorious day

up from the grave he rose again

In less than 1 week our entire world changed.  Isabella was two years old and Abigail nine months old.  We were enjoying life with our young and beautiful family.  Dave had just given his notice at Windstream and was starting his new job as a director at Frontier.  We were excited about celebrating Abbi's first Christmas while watching the joy on Bella's face as we surrounded ourselves with family for the holidays.  And now, we were facing a world of unknowns.

And as He stands in victory

sin's curse has lost it's grip on me

for I am His and He is mine

bought with the precious blood of Christ

The worst part, for me, was that I wasn't with Dave when he was given the life changing news.  I was home with our daughters.  We never asked for someone to watch the girls since we didn't want to worry our families about something we didn't yet know ourselves.  So, when I got the call from Dave's doctor office that someone needed to come pick him up because he was understandably overcome with emotion - I felt helpless and heartbroken.

No guilt in life, no fear in death

this is the power of Christ in me

from life's first cry to final breath

Jesus commands my destiny

There sat, the love of my life, entirely alone.  There sat, my best friend, without the physical support of his wife.  There sat, the father of my beautiful girls, worrying about what our future looked like.  And, because it was still so early in the testing process, we didn't know any details.  What type of cancer did he have?  Had the cancer spread?  What would the treatment be?  What was the treatment success rate?

No power of hell, no scheme of man

can ever pluck me from His hand

'till He returns or calls me home

here in the power of Christ I'll stand

I called my parents and asked them to please come get the girls, no questions asked.  Shortly after hanging up with them, my phone rang.  It was my best childhood friend, who I had not talked to in over a year.  She felt, in her heart, the need to call me at that exact moment.  A God moment!  He knew I needed someone, and there she was...

In Christ alone

By the time dad and mom were able to get to our house, Dave had decided he needed to go do something...anything...to act as a distraction.  Together we headed to the movies, where we sat in the back row and watched Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol.  I'm not sure either of us actually paid attention to the movie, but it helped us at least get our emotions under control before we shared the news with our families.

In Christ alone

Upon leaving the movie theater we went to my parents home.  We had asked Mark, Becky and Alisha to all be there when we shared with them this new turn of events.  From there, we went to Dave and Donna's house and told them, along with Danielle and Matt, the same information.  Our request was to try and make Christmas as "normal" as possible for the sake of our children.

I find my strength, I find my hope

I find my help, in Christ alone

when fear assails, when darkness falls

I find my peace, in Christ alone.

On Friday, December 23, a CT Scan was done to determine if the cancer had spread into Dave's abdomen.  Thankfully, it had not gone that far, however it had made an appearance in several lymph nodes.  Surgery was scheduled to remove the tumor on Friday, January 13, 2012.  We were told to discuss our options in regards to furthering our family since it was likely we would not be able to have any more biological children following the surgery.  Which, again, God showed Himself to us since adoption has always been on our hearts.

 I give my life, I give my all

I sing this song, to Christ alone

The King of Kings, the Lord of Lords

All heaven sings, to Christ alone

The tumor was successfully removed during surgery and the pathology report showed Dave had stage 2 seminoma, which is the more treatable cancer.  The next step was to discuss treatment options to kill the cancer growing in the lymphatic system.  After meeting with several doctors, chemotherapy was ruled out and radiation became our course of action.  On Monday, March 19, 2012, he began radiation treatments Monday through Friday for 6 weeks.  It was hard, he was sick, yet you could see his inner strength and desire to fight shine through and the power of prayer working!  His 30th birthday was April 8 of that year, where we celebrated both his life AND the end of radiation treatments.

To Christ alone, to Christ alone

After six months of waiting to see if the radiation was effective, Dave was declared cancer free on Tuesday, October 23, 2012!  It was the moment we had prayed for, the moment we had hoped for, and the moment we rejoiced in!

'till he returns or calls me home

here in the power of Christ I'll stand

On each annual appointment in the years that have followed, we hold our breath.  Waiting, praying, hoping that it's still gone.  That it will forever be gone.  And now, I refuse to sit home and wait for the updated report while Dave goes by himself, but I insist on going to each and every appointment.  By his side I will forever be, I never want him to feel alone again.

here in the power of Christ I'll stand

Please pray with us, that everything in his body is perfect, that he is still 100% healed.  Either way, though, we will rejoice in God's will for our lives and cherish each moment we have!