Discipline and Cookies
It's been exactly 5 months (to the day) since I blogged about anything. We came off of Aidan's adoption and jumped feet first into summer. I plan to write about all the fun and amazing places we visited, but that is not today's topic of conversation.
In the past, I have used Far Above Rubies to write letters to Bella and Abbi. I love that this is a place I can clearly communicate things to my children, so today I am writing specifically to Aidan...
My sweet boy -
This has been a tough week for you in the obedience department. You are two years old. You are a boy. You are two years old. You are tired from keeping up with our crazy back-to-school schedule. You are two years old. You are still adjusting to preschool and what authority looks like from other adults. Did I mention that you are two years old?
I'm sorry that you did not earn your cookie at Wegmans today and that you are, very clearly, upset with me. However, we had a chat earlier this morning... remember? Our deal was, if you had a good day at preschool and listened to your teachers then you could get a cookie when we went to Wegmans. Unfortunately, you did not hold up your end of the bargain, which left me with no choice but to follow through with your "no cookie" consequence.
Consequences are tough. They are not fun. But, here's the truth... while consequences suck (and while they make me look like the bad guy in the grocery store) they are also necessary.
As your mama I have the most important of all jobs: To help you mature into a responsible adult. To teach you values and skills. To allow you the freedom to make mistakes while still learning how to make good choices. And, at the end of each day, to show you what compassion and grace and forgiveness feel like.
Even though you are angry with me right now, I want you to remember two important things.
1.) I am not angry with you. We are all sinners. We all make bad choices. Tomorrow is a new day.
2.) I love you. I love you enough to let you experience discipline. Not because I want to see you hurt or upset, but because it is important for you to learn what godly character looks like.
Today it's just a cookie, but as you learn and grow those consequences will change. My prayer is that you one day come to realize that every word, action, warning and consequence had its purpose... and that is to point you to Jesus.
I chose you. I love you. I will always forgive you.
Love,
Your Mama
In the past, I have used Far Above Rubies to write letters to Bella and Abbi. I love that this is a place I can clearly communicate things to my children, so today I am writing specifically to Aidan...
My sweet boy -
This has been a tough week for you in the obedience department. You are two years old. You are a boy. You are two years old. You are tired from keeping up with our crazy back-to-school schedule. You are two years old. You are still adjusting to preschool and what authority looks like from other adults. Did I mention that you are two years old?
I'm sorry that you did not earn your cookie at Wegmans today and that you are, very clearly, upset with me. However, we had a chat earlier this morning... remember? Our deal was, if you had a good day at preschool and listened to your teachers then you could get a cookie when we went to Wegmans. Unfortunately, you did not hold up your end of the bargain, which left me with no choice but to follow through with your "no cookie" consequence.
Consequences are tough. They are not fun. But, here's the truth... while consequences suck (and while they make me look like the bad guy in the grocery store) they are also necessary.
As your mama I have the most important of all jobs: To help you mature into a responsible adult. To teach you values and skills. To allow you the freedom to make mistakes while still learning how to make good choices. And, at the end of each day, to show you what compassion and grace and forgiveness feel like.
Even though you are angry with me right now, I want you to remember two important things.
1.) I am not angry with you. We are all sinners. We all make bad choices. Tomorrow is a new day.
2.) I love you. I love you enough to let you experience discipline. Not because I want to see you hurt or upset, but because it is important for you to learn what godly character looks like.
Today it's just a cookie, but as you learn and grow those consequences will change. My prayer is that you one day come to realize that every word, action, warning and consequence had its purpose... and that is to point you to Jesus.
I chose you. I love you. I will always forgive you.
Love,
Your Mama
For the moment all disciple seems painful
rather than pleasant, but later it yields
the peaceful fruit of righteousness
to those who have been trained by it.
Hebrews 12:11
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