Until Death Do Us Part.
On May 19th Dave and I will celebrate 17 years together. SEVENTEEN YEARS! I was a junior and Dave was a senior in high school (we were babies, I know) at the prom together - dreaming about our future. A future that included us getting our college degrees. A future where we bought a house and lived happily married. A future that included children. A future with that typical "American Dream" landscape.
We did... graduate from college - Dave from RIT in 2004 as an Information Technology major and myself from Roberts Wesleyan in 2005 with my degree in Elementary and Special Education. On February 14, 2004, Dave proposed and we said "I do" on November 20, 2004. We bought a beautiful home. Well, actually more-than-one since we outgrew our log cabin and had to upgrade. With great joy we welcomed two precious baby girls into our family - Isabella on July 17, 2009, followed by Abigail on March 1, 2011. It was exactly like we had imagined.
"...to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."
It's amazing how those vows begin to take on an entirely different meaning when that perfect future ends up not being... well, perfect. Because, when you find out your husband has stage 2 cancer, perfect is no longer a word in your vocabulary.
Dave was diagnosed with testicular cancer on December 22, 2011, and I can promise you that we have seen some "for worse" moments during these past 5 years. Times when we couldn't breathe wondering if the cancer had spread beyond the lymphatic system into other organs of the body. Times when my heart stood still as my husband was wheeled away for surgery. Times when Dave would come home from radiation treatments so sick and so exhausted that he didn't even have the endurance to hold his baby girls. Times when the realization that we could not have more biological children left our world spinning. Times when all we could do was cry out to Jesus for strength, because we didn't have the strength to get through another day on our own.
But, my friends, even when life is hard - God is good! He used His people - the very hands and feet of Christ - to bring us hope. We were surrounded by love, we were uplifted in prayer, we were blessed with meals and babysitting help, we were encouraged and we are still overwhelmed by God's provision.
On March 22, 2017, Dave was medically declared cancer free! Not in remission, not on a path to wellness, but completely free of this horrible disease. Yes, cancer had changed our "perfect dream life" but it also gave us something wonderful in return...
Dave posted this on Facebook, and I want to share it with you today because it is a perfect example of how God makes beauty from ashes - how He turns brokenness into perfection.
"Rocked to the core... was the moment I got home from sharing with my family that I had been diagnosed with cancer.
The memories from that day are still vivid. Cassie coming to pick me up from the doctor's office when I couldn't drive myself home. Getting lost in the fear, the worry, the shock of losing my girls. Going to the movies to think about and prepare myself for telling our loved ones what we were about to undergo as a family.
Five years later and I just had my last check up. Five year later and I'm officially discharged from treatment, from proactive monitoring, and from check-ups.
Five years later I'm healthy and blessed. I still have my girls and in a few more days my boy will officially become a Wilson. God was preparing me for this great moment of finishing our family.
The fear and challenges of surgery, radiation, fear, and exhaustion are all worth it to add Aidan to our family. Without those I don't believe we would have sought out foster care to grow our family. I'd do it all over again to get him without a second thought."
Here we now stand, a family of four miraculously transformed into a family of five, made whole because of God's incredible grace. (More to come on Aidan's adoption day in a later post.) It is not the perfect life we had planned 17 years ago at our high school prom... no, it's a life better than either of us could have imagined. A life shaped into something beautiful by a loving and perfect God.
Both Dave and I want to thank you for your prayers these past 5 years. It is with joyful hearts that we say "goodbye" to this chapter of life and excitedly look to our future.
If you are new to our "cancer story" - you can read about it on these previous blog postings.
1. This Wife's Perspective on Cancer
2. Cancer... The Aftershock
3. Perseverance is the Evidence of Love
We did... graduate from college - Dave from RIT in 2004 as an Information Technology major and myself from Roberts Wesleyan in 2005 with my degree in Elementary and Special Education. On February 14, 2004, Dave proposed and we said "I do" on November 20, 2004. We bought a beautiful home. Well, actually more-than-one since we outgrew our log cabin and had to upgrade. With great joy we welcomed two precious baby girls into our family - Isabella on July 17, 2009, followed by Abigail on March 1, 2011. It was exactly like we had imagined.
"...to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."
It's amazing how those vows begin to take on an entirely different meaning when that perfect future ends up not being... well, perfect. Because, when you find out your husband has stage 2 cancer, perfect is no longer a word in your vocabulary.
Dave was diagnosed with testicular cancer on December 22, 2011, and I can promise you that we have seen some "for worse" moments during these past 5 years. Times when we couldn't breathe wondering if the cancer had spread beyond the lymphatic system into other organs of the body. Times when my heart stood still as my husband was wheeled away for surgery. Times when Dave would come home from radiation treatments so sick and so exhausted that he didn't even have the endurance to hold his baby girls. Times when the realization that we could not have more biological children left our world spinning. Times when all we could do was cry out to Jesus for strength, because we didn't have the strength to get through another day on our own.
But, my friends, even when life is hard - God is good! He used His people - the very hands and feet of Christ - to bring us hope. We were surrounded by love, we were uplifted in prayer, we were blessed with meals and babysitting help, we were encouraged and we are still overwhelmed by God's provision.
On March 22, 2017, Dave was medically declared cancer free! Not in remission, not on a path to wellness, but completely free of this horrible disease. Yes, cancer had changed our "perfect dream life" but it also gave us something wonderful in return...
Dave posted this on Facebook, and I want to share it with you today because it is a perfect example of how God makes beauty from ashes - how He turns brokenness into perfection.
"Rocked to the core... was the moment I got home from sharing with my family that I had been diagnosed with cancer.
The memories from that day are still vivid. Cassie coming to pick me up from the doctor's office when I couldn't drive myself home. Getting lost in the fear, the worry, the shock of losing my girls. Going to the movies to think about and prepare myself for telling our loved ones what we were about to undergo as a family.
Five years later and I just had my last check up. Five year later and I'm officially discharged from treatment, from proactive monitoring, and from check-ups.
Five years later I'm healthy and blessed. I still have my girls and in a few more days my boy will officially become a Wilson. God was preparing me for this great moment of finishing our family.
The fear and challenges of surgery, radiation, fear, and exhaustion are all worth it to add Aidan to our family. Without those I don't believe we would have sought out foster care to grow our family. I'd do it all over again to get him without a second thought."
Here we now stand, a family of four miraculously transformed into a family of five, made whole because of God's incredible grace. (More to come on Aidan's adoption day in a later post.) It is not the perfect life we had planned 17 years ago at our high school prom... no, it's a life better than either of us could have imagined. A life shaped into something beautiful by a loving and perfect God.
He will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
festive praise instead of despair.
Isaiah 61:3a
Both Dave and I want to thank you for your prayers these past 5 years. It is with joyful hearts that we say "goodbye" to this chapter of life and excitedly look to our future.
If you are new to our "cancer story" - you can read about it on these previous blog postings.
1. This Wife's Perspective on Cancer
2. Cancer... The Aftershock
3. Perseverance is the Evidence of Love
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